


you saw me first

by grootmorning



Category: To All the Boys I've Loved Before Series - Jenny Han, To All the Boys I’ve Loved Before (2018)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - College/University, F/M, Oblivious Lara Jean, Post-Canon, Romance, he knows it's not her fault people are drawn to her, he'd always known that people would love her once they got to know her, jealous peter's gotta happen sometime right?, jealous!peter
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-24
Updated: 2018-08-24
Packaged: 2019-07-01 12:35:07
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,690
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15774234
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/grootmorning/pseuds/grootmorning
Summary: post-canon, college!au. Peter Kavinsky visits Lara Jean at college. he always knew people would love lara jean covey and that high school was holding her back. so maybe he was a little jealous about her college friendscan be read as a standalone or a precursor toyou did what now?





	you saw me first

Peter crossed the courtyard briskly, turning his head left and right trying to catch a glimpse of that familiar figure that he knew so well. His phone buzzed, and he pulled it out to tap at the text, not even slowing his pace. There wasn't time for that.

_[4:38pm] Lara Jean: I'm done with my classes too! Just hanging out with some friends in the main courtyard until dinner._

Main courtyard. Main courtyard. Peter was pretty sure he was in the main courtyard. So why couldn't he see her?

_[4:40pm] Peter: Sounds fun. Dinner plans with them?_

The frustration at not being able to find her was growing, until a familiar peal of laughter reached his ears and he spun around, locating the source of it at a stone table just off the middle of the courtyard. Lara Jean pushed her hair out of her space as she laughed at something the guy next to her was saying, pointing at the girl opposite her as they conversed. 

There she was.

He gazed at her, unable to do anything else but look at her, rooted to the spot, and filled with the emotions of longing and sadness that came from not seeing her for the past four months since they'd parted for college. They spoke on the phone of course, texting, calls, FaceTime, everything, but it was always going to be different from having her right there next to him. Peter had gotten way too used to having her around at high school. 

He continued observing Lara Jean in silence as the guy next to her said something else, watching closely for a reaction from her. Peter didn't like that at all. He continued watching as she ignored her friend, and flipped her phone over on the table. Peter's heart lifted at the way Lara Jean smiled at the text he'd just sent and hurried to tap out a reply. 

Right on cue, his phone buzzed in his pocket but it didn't matter anymore. Peter wasn't waiting any longer. With long strides, he made his way towards the table, ignoring everyone else around him and cutting through the masses swiftly. 

Peter was getting closer.

Lara Jean had placed the phone back down, looking around to jump back into the conversation. But just at that moment when he wasn't more than a few paces away, as she looked around, she happened to glance right at him.

The blank stare as she stared at him lasted for a few seconds, which was followed by shock, amazement, and finally,  _finally_ , that shining happiness. It was one of the most beautiful things he'd ever seen. 

"Peter!"

Pushing up from the table, Lara Jean ignored the sudden halt in conversation around her at her exclamation, running those few more steps towards him and throwing her arms around his neck happily. 

God, he'd forgotten how much he loved her scent. Burying his face in her neck, Peter wrapped his arms around her waist, lifting her up and spinning her around. Finally, he felt complete. Now all he felt was giddy happiness inside. And all he heard was her delighted giggles and her pleas for him to put her down.

He guessed he couldn't carry her forever, although he would give it a shot if he had to. After a few more moments, Peter came to a stop, still listening to Lara Jean's infectious laughter in his ears. Bending his knees so her feet could touch the floor again, Peter released his death grip on her, opting instead to place his arms around her shoulders, pulling her into another hug. Lara Jean sighed happily, moving her arms as well to wrap around his waist to squeeze him tightly. 

"What are you doing here?" Her voice was muffled by his tee but he heard her clearly. He always had.

He dropped a kiss onto her hair, as easily as he'd done when they'd first parted, "A surprise of course."

"You drove _four hours_ for a surprise." Her fingers tightened around his back, under his jacket. 

She never really grasped the full realisation of the fact that he would do anything for her. "Of course I did."

"You better leave soon though," his brows creased in confusion at her words, but smoothed over once she'd continued in a jesting tone. "I have a boyfriend. He's tall, really really handsome and really strong. He plays lacrosse, he could kick your ass."

"I'm not worried," he swayed them a little on the spot, pleased that she was back in his arms again. "I'll kick his ass back."

Their little moment was over all too soon though. Lara Jean suddenly seemed to remember that they had an audience of her friends and released him, turning back around to face them. Peter had no qualms about keeping an arm around her shoulders, pulling her closer into his side. 

He still didn't like the look of the guy who had been trying to get Lara Jean's attention.

The same guy who was now sizing him up, momentarily glaring at the arm he had around Lara Jean.

"Hey guys, this is Peter. My boyfriend," Lara Jean never tripped over the last word nowadays. Back when they'd first started dating, she used to do it all the time. Over time, she'd gotten used to it. She liked the feel of the word in her mouth. "I've told you guys about him."

"Did you now?" He tapped her nose affectionately, getting a giggle in return, before raising his hand to greet them cheerily. "It's nice to meet you guys. I've heard about you guys too."

Introductions were made all around, and Peter shook the guy's hand in passing. Jason, he would remember that name. His grip was bruising, but Peter could give as good as he got, making sure to grasp extra hard. He smirked internally as the guy winced upon release.

He hoped Lara Jean wouldn't want to stay long, and was pleased when Lara Jean made excuses for them to leave, insisting that she wanted to spend some time with her boyfriend before he left. And just like that, she was taking his hand, clinging to his arm again as they walked towards his car. Memories flooded back from the first few times she'd done so. The lacrosse field where they'd first kissed for real ...

Peter was brought back by her speaking. "So my apartment's this way, and there's open parking just in front of it. Cheryl, my roommate, is away today and she won't be back until Sunday, so we don't have to worry about disturbing her or anything," she chattered on happily. Peter was just content to listen to her speak, her voice not garbled by a bad connection or by the tinny voice through his phone. "I still can't believe you're here, Peter!"

The car ride was less than ten minutes, and before he knew it, Peter was hanging his jacket up on the back of Lara Jean's desk chair, moving to sit where she patted the bed next to her. The room was decorated in exactly her style, with fairy lights adorning the headboard, and pictures of him, her family and her friends where she could see them. Books were stacked high on her desk table and it was covered end to end with notes and stationery.

"You still reading those?" he pointed at the stack of 'bodice rippers' next to her bed, and Lara Jean coughed, pushing them discreetly to the floor and under her bed. 

"Just when I'm bored."

"I know you read them 'cause you miss me," he smiled smugly, resting his head against the wall and placing a hand behind him. His other arm snaked around her waist, tucking her into his side and under his arm gently. "But it's okay, I'm here now. All your problems are solved." He avoided a smack to his head, laughing as he did so.

"Speaking of which, I still don't know why you're here." She shrugged her own coat off, pushing it to the end of the bed as she leaned her head against his chest.

He feigned insult, using a knuckle to nudge at her shoulder, "What? I can't miss my girlfriend?"

Lara Jean laughed, patting his cheek placatingly, "Of course, you can. I miss you all the time." She smiled up at him as he hummed contentedly at her words. "I was just wondering if I missed a special occasion or something. Maybe while I was too busy studying."

"I just wanted to see you," Peter whispered softly, leaning down to kiss her properly, now that they were finally alone. He had the free time, he had the car, he had the motivation. Why not.

Lara Jean smiled into the kiss, framing his face with her hands and pressing closer to him. The warmth of him felt like it was seeping into her bones, and the sigh that escaped her was utterly pleased and contented. Peter was here. The last four months seemed to just slip away like smoke. 

Kissing his way across her cheek and across her jaw, Peter mouthed his way down to her neck. He'd always liked her shiver when he kissed her neck and her shoulders. She was a little ticklish there, and he knew it.

But she knew his weaknesses too. With a mischievous grin, she pressed a firm thumb into the spot just under his belly button, making him yelp and jump away from her. Laughing, they both mock wrestled for a bit, before returning to cuddling. Peter leaned back against the wall, tugging Lara Jean half into his lap indulgently.

They had both missed this very much.

Hours could be spent just resting in each other's arms, enjoying the other's presence. "I'm glad you're here," Lara Jean murmured, linking their fingers across his thighs. Peter responded by squeezing her hand tightly, crossing one leg over hers in comfort. They lapsed into comfortable silence again, with Peter twirling her hair around his fingers.

Suddenly, she cocked her head at something, eyes amused and slightly teary, "You're wearing my scrunchie."

"Well, yeah," Peter was amused that she sounded touched. He took it as a given really. The feel of the scrunchie around his wrist everyday. Tugging at it slightly, he heard it snap against his skin. "You gave it to me, of course I'm going to wear it. I wear it every day."

"Oh, I didn't - "

"Every day," he said insistently, sincerely, leaving Lara Jean trailing off into a thrilled sort of silence. "Although I feel like I should return it to you."

Her face fell a little, before firming back up again into a neutral expression. "Why?"

Ignoring her questioning look and reaching over to pull her hair back the way he watched her do it, Peter bundled her hair into a messy ponytail, tying it off with the scrunchie. When he was satisfied that her hair wasn't going to fall out, he let it go, pulling back to see an entirely befuddled expression on her face.

"Peter?"

"You're too pretty for your own good," he wrinkled his nose up, shaking a finger back and forth when she let out a surprised chuckle. "No, it's true. I see the way the other boys look at you."

"No, they don't," Lara Jean reached up to remove the scrunchie. She'd gotten almost used to having her hair down more often than having it up by now. It was only put up when she was going for a run, or messing around in the kitchen, or the mad cramming for exams when she couldn't bear to have it flying everywhere as she studied.

Peter stopped her, a serious expression on his face. "You have no idea. I've been on campus for an hour, and I already see it. Especially your friend,  _Jason_." His voice hardened on the last word, causing her eyes to widen in surprise.

"Jason doesn't mean anything by it."

"Then why did he look like he wanted to kill me earlier?" He scoffed, half ashamed that he was feeling this way but unable to hide it.

She fell back into her usual quiet composure, playing with his fingers quietly. Peter let her do it in lieu of an answer, enjoying the feeling of her small fingers pressing up and down his arm too much to press any further. 

It was a few minutes before she spoke again, "Peter, I'm not going to hide who I am anymore. I let my hair down now because I like it down, and you helped me to see that it was nice down, remember?"

Yeah, he remembered the first time he took the scrunchie out of her hair. The sudden and dawning realisation that Lara Jean was not the wallflower everybody thought her to be. The uncomfortable conversations he had to endure in locker rooms as more and more guys began to take notice of her. He remembered all of those times. He didn't like it. No, he wanted her all to himself. It was a ridiculously selfish notion that he knew was impossible but the young boy in him wanted to try.

He nodded grudgingly, and she patted his cheek again softly. "I'm not letting my hair down now because I want people to notice me. This jealously, while slightly surprising and a little gratifying, is unwarranted, you hear me?"

It lifted the weight on his shoulders to hear her say it. No one was more surprised than him that this ugly side of him had reared his head so quickly, and yet been vanquished so easily with a few quiet words from Lara Jean. The small kernel of insecurity that always plagued him concerning the fact that one day Lara Jean might realise that he was a worthless piece of scum and dump him was shoved aside and he focused on Lara Jean, who was currently tugging the scrunchie out of her hair and replacing it around his wrist carefully. 

"Keep it with you," she said earnestly, looking up at him. Peter couldn't help himself, he leaned down to kiss her again, pouring his emotions of love and bittersweet happiness at being reunited for a day into it. Lara Jean climbed fully into his lap, kissing him back with equal enthusiasm. 

He loved that she wasn't scoffing at his insecurity or jealousy, but was patiently telling him that it was unfounded and that she never even considered wavering. Again, Peter was slightly ashamed that the jealousy spell even came over him, but Lara Jean shushed him again, reassuring him that it was okay. That they were okay.

In a few hours, they probably would have to say goodbye again, heartbreakingly and longingly until the next time they could reunite again. But Peter and Lara Jean knew they were both going to be okay. The distance had never mattered to them.

Coming together like this just strengthened their conviction that there was never going to be anyone else.

The silence was broken when Lara Jean asked him a question. Peter shook himself out of his thoughts, returning his attention to her again.

"Hm?" He raised her hand to his lips, pressing a kiss to her fingers.

She huffed, slightly exasperated, "I asked, if you have a change of clothes in your car."

"You know, I always do," Peter was confused. Where was she going with this? "Why?"

"I was thinking, that you could leave me a hoodie or a shirt to keep with me," Lara Jean stared at the comforter, her cheeks heating up as she continued speaking, the embarrassment at even asking rising up to make her trip over her words again. "Just for me to wear when I'm missing you, or around, wherever." 

She wanted to wear his clothes out in public, because she wasn't afraid to tell people she was with him, or that she was taken. Huh.

Just like the moment where she'd told all her friends he was her boyfriend, Peter felt his mouth widen into an uncontrollable grin, overwhelmed with love for Lara Jean.

"I'll give you two."

**Author's Note:**

> back again. anybody tired of me yet?
> 
> tumblr: [here](http://ltfrankcastle.tumblr.com)  
> twitter: [here](http://twitter.com/ltfrankcastie)


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